Thursday, June 29, 2006

Infosys ne Banaye Mujhe Mammu!!!

Kya Mammu ban gaya Munnabhai!!

3 hours later...

I was only ragging the newbies!! :D
Girls please get out in your strappy evening best! And guys – make us proud to be seen partying with you! ;)

Suggestion: You can change into your evening outfits just before we leave for the bus.


Pre-lunch phase...
An email from Ayesha ...

Rajdeep, Samee & Sharmistha – welcome aboard!
The theme for tomorrow’s party is “Mallus Rule!”. The dress code for guys is a mundu, and for girls is the traditional kerala sari (shakuntala style). For more details, please speak to Srija/Manju/Elizabeth (CC). I’ve attached pictures for your convenience.

Dress code is mandatory.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

A String of Malls!!!

A string of Malls

Evolution seems to be the mantra of any Indian cities these days. In the name of evolution aka modernization, we have a strings of malls that has everything that u dreamt off.I mean right from the

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Kabhie Xora Kabhie Kuch Aur!!!


Tiny drops of water makes a mighty true! I am pondering over it while sitting at my cubicle which has resisted me more than 2 years now. It is in this context that I chose to start of the topic with the above lines. I am moving to pastures that expectedly would be much greener and wealthier..This being my last day at Xora (name of the existing company), I've decided to share some experiencs.

I am not a real job-hopper, so in case you're wondering if I make myself available for every job interview, it would be wrong. My tryst with job-hunting has always been fascinating with much of the time being wooed or booed rather by the HRs. But, hang on those pretty HRs with a 24x7 smile surely have a job to do; mind you, recruiting me isn't an easy job. I was thinking of switching over to Technical Writing when I received a call from an HR of Xora. I was asked to attend the interview sharp at 10:30 hours, and I still remember doing a last minute change to my resume.

The job location was Indiranagar and after an initial written test that tested my english grammar and html skills, a technical interview was taken. After the interview was taken, I was asked to come the following day and meet the MD. I was prompt in clearing the test and on June 9, 2004 I was given the appointment letter.

I had some very good and some horrible Xora experiences--woh Karan Johar kehta hai naa "Kabhie Khushi Kabhi Gham". Let's keep the good things for later purposes...

Firstly, I had this quarrel with the man who thinks he knows all 'under the sun'. I am not really sure that if this BOSSY character is going to stay like this forever. Secondly, occasional verbal fights with my Manager left me strong. But he's a real nice guy; its just that I am bad. Thirdly, some guys robbed my money and all on my way back home. Fourthly, a chauvinist of every sort who made my life miserable with his TIME MANAGEMENt

Right Here, Bite Now with a Kutty!

I remember Salman in the days when he could identify something called 'shirts' made a statement "Dosti Kiya Hai to Nibhana To Padega Hi". Ashraf has visulized and incorporated that statement in his first proposal.
Ladies and Gentelman, the author is proud to show you moments of India's first proposal Online-Ashraf and Mili

Post=proposal--Do you want me to say "I LOVE U' in Urdu?

Let's get naughty Kutty!

To catch a Fly!!!

It’s a city of dreams- dreams, which are of paramount and weird. Bangalore also dreams: dream to catapult itself in Singapore’s identity, but don’t one sense danger too! The recent months have witnessed an increase in the rate of Sexual misdemeanors in India. Be it two school kids or an old man preying over his daughter-like-renters, its certain Voyeurism has come taken a new fold in India. Though Bangalore hasn’t been still glorified by its existence, but can you be sure that there are no Spy Cameras hovering around? Is Voyeurism here to stay or are we late in realizing its existence? Even as I write the article, I can sense something wrong happening somewhere. Are women really safe or have privacy of women under threat?

How do you define Voyeurism? Well, secret act of viewing others in sexual situations involving erotic play and taking the pictures without the consent of the others is what we can say for now. A person who has this peeping eye is called a Voyer. It would have been an easy task had we some tool for identifying a voyer. Interestingly voyer is not a hidden person. They are ordinary persons whom we encounter in day-to-day life. Often people suffer from the notion that Voyeurs are a class sitting in some cyber cafes or sexually perverted minds but these are wrong.

Consider the real-life scene. A woman in a crowded bus and manages to get a seat. A man of middle age goes near to the ladies seat though there are enough spaces in the bus to stand. He gradually puts her body over her or there’s an attempt to touch her. The woman noticed that but hardly can do anything. The writer happened to witness these scenes but was helpless since my fellow passenger thought it was pretty common. I could sense the amount of harassment that poor school and college girls have to undergo everyday at every point of the time. It’s pretty easy to write the stuffs sitting in an air-conditioned room. Let’s if we can analyze for sometime why do we have so much voyerous?

Education would be the topmost priority to begin with. Over half of the population remains desolated from literacy. Add to that they are introduced to all C grade movies at an early age. Things take a strange turn as they take their expeditions to youth. It’s tough to single out education to be the only cause of mockery for education in turn brings out latest technologies and technologies have harbored sexual fantasizes.

The first thing that generally crossed my mind when I heard the word ‘Internet’ was Sex. Yes! And I am not shy to admit that these have been quite an unusual experience for the first few months. I am much more wiser now and the Voyeurism in me has shielded quite a lot. But still am amused with the way things are shaping up these days. Every day you take up the paper or view the Television you have some sex-scandal or the other. Often the technology has been blamed for these actions, but my query is we not the guys behind this voyeurism or has voyeurism lead to technology.

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Turing over a new leaf!!!

Ah here it goes again, you wont learn from your mistake. Right from day one this has been quite a common statement from my Manager to me. I have been blasted on many occasions for documentation. My manager’s review carried strings of comments (wide range and colourful!) and many of them pointing: I am unable to explain the message in a simple and concise manner. Now, initially I was reluctant to explore the mudholes, but finally when one day I had a look into my document and found out- it clearly lacked a simple approach. My redundancy to acquire the basics KISS has never been easy since I was simultaneously doing content writing.

Typically, when you are documenting something you need to keep your target audience in mind; your writing varies according to the audience. Obviously, the documentation your message will be bit different

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Getting Hazed in Purple!!!

Love comes in many forms ala Friends who would even in your grave to see that your are fully drunk. Meet the man who calls himself 'Princess of Darkness'--Balaji..Here, we are in Purple Haze and Bala dutifully checks out that yours truly is drunk. This is a moment that I am cherishing since I'm going berserk after that drink.

Friday, June 09, 2006

Wah Mere Dulhe Raja!!!

Dulhe Raja ---Shaddi ke kuch din pehle Jaynagar Shop Main

Thursday, June 01, 2006

TO be a Virgin or NOT!

"Virginity can be lost by a thought", is the possible explanation to my conclusion. It all started when Adam decided to obey what Eve said. The event didn't only trigger the henpecked era but also led to the civilization.

Questions are raised why did Eve did it? Was she married? Well we all doubt. She was a virgin who collapsed the gates because she couldn't stand guarding it.

Times changed. When the films of 'American Pie', 'Road Run' and 'Forty Days and Forty Nights' used to hit the stands, I used to sneak somehow to get two tickets and make into the hall with my girlfriend clasping her hand. And I felt great because we were not married and she was a virgin.

Once during a college fest I had met a beautiful American blonde and during our tête-à-tête I asked whether she prefers virginity or not and she said "it's a wonderful way of getting popular in school". I guess a clue had been taken from that by the youth in Bangalore.

I agree its quite hard for a teenager to be virgin but then keeping your virginity until you reach a mature stage and knowing the ifs and bits of birth control, and possible STD is important.

My girlfriend used to get wild sometimes, she wants me to pamper her but I am firm that if she is going to have it then it's only after marriage.

Am I harsh to her, or she doubts by manhood? That's a thing of ignominy. But whether she knows herself well enough that is the all important question.

The girl, whom I am going to date in future is probably going to be my wife. What are the things I require from her? Love, care, and most important 100 per cent trust.

Its all case of trust when it comes to live with a girl, if she had a pre-marital sex, she should be bold enough to dispose the matter to me, the same case holds for me too.

I may sound too vague but I don't understand the concept of casual sex. For me there has to be some emotion involved when I am going to sleep with someone.

And that emotion can only come when the particular person has rapport with me and I believe getting married for sex is" like buying 747 for free peanuts."

Men in general are better than women to talk to, I see I can talk to a man more than a women. Most of my friends believe that I am very conservative in my outlook.

That a girl clamors for sex and the ‘TDH’ (Tall, dark & Handsome) factor works, but to me marriage is an institution, the more compassion there, the more investment you do in it, the more valuable it becomes.

I would never want myself to be confronted in a situation where my wife come to make a statement that she resorted to pre-marital sex earlier and now she has problems.

I don't like myself to be the lover who said that he would go hell for her and now married he is undergoing hell.

This is the worst case think in a socialite party when someone tells you that your wife had been in his bed earlier that would make the situation really grim.

I don't curse women for pre-marital sex but in future there should be no excuse. If a man thinks that by love and compassion it would be quite reachable to solve the matter, then its ok.

But I am of the notion that I want someone whose true to me in her words .I think man who have pierced ear are better prepared for marriage and I am one since I have experienced pain and brought jewellery too.

I don't know what fate has stored for me but definitely yes! I will go by the lines as I frequently tell it my girl, "when a man holds a women hand before marriage its love, after marriage it is self-defense."

And who would not like to be protected by a virgin, after all Mother Mary was a virgin too.

Indiscrimination at Xora!!!

Oh Lord!! Why this indiscrimination--Check it out

Boys using Toilet

"I can see boys you inside, this is boys' toilet door and Boys are doing urine inside." - Pet Man

Girls Toilet Door
"I sawed you again and Lipisitick culture leads to these activities and boys cannot see through it and increase productivity under the orange suns. " - Pet Man

Party Time at Xora!!!

Lunch at resort: 1:00 PM
Facilities at Resort: Swimming Pool, Cricket, Tennis, Squash, Badminton and Table
High Tea: 4:00 PM
Departure: 6:00 PM
We also have some games organized to make this event more enjoyable.
Those of you want to use the swimming pool please do not forget to carry your swimming trunks. (Strict NO NO to skinny dipping, I don't remember seeing this on our Employee rule book)
If anyone is planning to come directly to the resort here is the address and contact numbers.
Ramee Guestline Resort
#112, AIADB, Industrial Area
Hosur Road, Attibele
Bangalore - 562107
Contact person: Sushma (Guys looking for a Date could give this number a shot)
Contact no: 22295485/86/87

Prakash Sir ke Zabardast Email!!

The earlier mail was cleared from my out box, when we restarted the system, the same old mail has come( please check the date not the delivery date).
Ali we know you are healthy and have come to office.
Sorry for the inconvenience.

Manager -HR & Administration

Ali's response to Prakash's email:

I am very much well today. Had been some misunderstanding to you or must have got wrong info/stale news. I was sick but that was two weeks back.

Prakash wrote:

Ali is sick today.